Rhoad to the Altar: It’s about the day, not the date

Courtesy of sxc.hu
With the venue found, all we had to do was pick a date. Little did I know, that your date kind of picks you.

Up to this point, I had been pretty stressed out about trying to throw a massive party for all my closest friends and family for a respectable amount of cash. And once we got to planning, the stress kept mounting when I realized all the little things you have to account for: bouquets, centerpieces, lighting, food, beer and wine, bridesmaids/groomsmen, photographer, DJ, cake. And those are just the big things.

With the biggest stress of all — the venue — out of the way, I was feeling pretty good. Like I had taken one big boulder out of the massive sack of rocks I was trying to drag around.

Now, we just had to pick a date and pray that it was still available. I don’t know whether people stay engaged for years at a time, or just assume by 2015 they’re going to be engaged, but Lauxmont was already booking for three years away.

Before all this, I always thought there was some romantic number that I must pick to get married on. That’s how everyone does it, right? The specifically chosen date means this to him and that to me and then when you add all the number together it spells “love” in some weird symbolic way. Right? Um, no.

No one tells you that it doesn’t really matter what date you WANT — it’s the date that your choice wedding venue has open that really determines when you’re getting married.

Christian and I had narrowed it down to a time when it was “not hot.” We’re both sweaty messes when it gets to be above 70 degrees, and there was no way I was hauling around a 50 pound dress in the dead heat of summer. Having a spring wedding outside just seemed to ask for rain. So that led us to fall. I love everything about fall: the colors, the smells, the fact that you get to wear jeans again. Do they make a bridal hoodie?

Courtesy of sxc.hu
We decided on sometime in the fall, which is my favorite season, because the weather will be cooler for an outside wedding. Also, the leaves will be beautiful, meaning less money on flowers!

Once we narrowed that down, we also realized that November falls just outside the “wedding season,” and a lot of wedding venues typically lower their prices between November and March. Some outdoor locations also are closed during winter months, so be aware of that when choosing your date.

Another thing to take into consideration when choosing a date is what flowers will be available for decoration. If you’re budget-conscious, your favorite flowers could potentially cost double or triple what they might cost if they’re in season.

We decided on the first weekend in November. Hopefully, the leaves would hold out for beautiful pictures, and the weather wouldn’t be too hot or too cold. I was starting to get really excited. We have a place, we have a date, and that date is not yet taken, so we’re good to go.

The next day, Christian wakes me up to say goodbye for work … and to tell me that his college friend is getting married on Nov. 2, 2013. I don’t know at what point I got attached to that number, but apparently overnight, I had discovered a new found love for Nov. 2. Needless to say, the excitement that had been building plummeted, and I went back into panic mode over whether Lauxmont Farms would have any other days open.

Christian was on the ball and found out that the last Saturday in October was open. OK, that’s not so bad. I also suggested Oct. 13, which is a Sunday. If we couldn’t have the wedding in November to save us some cash, at least maybe we could do it on a Sunday. Most wedding venues also charge less to get married on Fridays and Sundays because they are less popular wedding days. Be sure to inquire about this if a Saturday wedding isn’t a must for you. The savings can be pretty spectacular.

We decided on Sunday, Oct. 13, 2013, because it’s the day before Columbus Day. It’s sort of a holiday, and any of our friends and family with federal jobs or school won’t have to worry about taking an extra day off. With my family coming from eight hours away, it gives them a little more flexibility.  Another tip for picking a date: Some venues charge more to get married on holidays. However, holidays are convenient for family that has to travel and would otherwise have to take time off. I know it’s “your day,” but trying the keep the inconvenience down for others is just courteous.

Well, 10-13-13 is kind of a cool date. It doesn’t add up to love in some symbolic language,  and it isn’t some great special time we shared together, but it is my future wedding day, so I suppose it has that going for it.

How did you pick your wedding date?

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8 Responses

  1. julie thompson says:

    I am so glad someone else is getting married on a Sunday. It felt a little lame, but we only had 4 months to plan. A Sunday wedding made things cheaper and everything we wanted was still available. It also happened to be Columbus Day weekend which has been nice for anniversaries.

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